fffcuk:

today this girl asked me if we were hiring and we are but i told her we weren’t because right now im the prettiest girl that works here and if she got hired i wouldn’t be anymore

rejective:

sorry i can’t go to your party next month i have a headache

majinbooze:

knees weak

arms are heavy

mom com home

make hte spagheti

supjono:

when people unfollow you and you’re left wondering which post was the final straw

zooeyclairedeschanel:

yes my thighs touch and so do the rest of my legs and also my feet in fact my whole bottom half is in one piece i am a mermaid